Did I just read yet another celebrity memoir? You bet! I’m Glad My Mom Died is my third celebrity memoir this year, following Hello, Molly! and Beyond the Wand. As always, I chose the audiobook, narrated by the author herself- there’s something special about listening to someone’s story in their own voice that isn’t afforded by words on a page. In this brave memoir, McCurdy explores deeply sensitive subjects like parental abuse, addiction, toxic relationships, and the burden of growing up too soon. Her honest-to-goodness storytelling is gripping from start to finish, laced with a delicate sense of humour that seldom feels misplaced.
McCurdy’s mom, Debra, proves to be a self-serving, hypocritical monster— robbing her daughter of her childhood and fueling her struggle with eating disorders. The memoir delves into their toxic, broken, and dysfunctional relationship, making you wonder if McCurdy will ever break free from her mother’s manipulative grip. When she finally takes control of her own life and liberates herself from the shackles of her mother’s influence, you can’t help but feel relieved and genuinely happy for her.
In some books we stumble upon that one nugget of wisdom that resonates so profoundly it finds a permanent home in your mind. For me, it’s “slips not slides”—a catchphrase McCurdy’s therapist shares, reminding her that making mistakes is inevitable, but it’s crucial not to let a slip turn into a slide. I’ve tried to embrace this wisdom, and now a bright blue sticky note beside my mirror reads “slips not slides”- encouraging me to forgive myself for my missteps and avoid spiralling into self-pity.
While I may not have watched McCurdy on Nickelodeon or faced her harrowing experiences, her story feels universally relatable. It’s a reminder that everyone grapples with challenges, maybe especially those who appear unscathed on the surface. I’m Glad My Mom Died is an empowering story of one girl’s resilience, and for whatever it’s worth, I find myself echoing the sentiment— I’m glad her mom’s negative influence is finally behind her, I’m glad her mom died too.
Here are some of my highlights.
- “SLIPS ARE TOTALLY NORMAL. When you have a slip, it’s just that. A slip. It doesn’t define you. It doesn’t make you a failure. The most important thing is that you don’t let that slip become a slide,”
- “I feel like the world is divided into two types of people: people who know loss and people who don’t.”
- “The problem with this is that if we beat ourselves up after a mistake, we add shame onto the guilt and frustration that we already feel about our mistake. That guilt and frustration can be helpful in moving us forward, but shame…shame keeps us stuck. It’s a paralyzing emotion. When we get caught in a shame spiral, we tend to make more of the same kinds of mistakes that caused us shame in the first place.”